The Trial of Donna Adelson

The verdict is freshly pronounced: Guilty. On all counts. And I sit here crying for this elderly woman who is probably guilty in some capacity of the murder of her ex son-in-law. This takes nothing away from the victim, Dan Markel. He was needed on this planet, one of the very best of us. And I still feel overrun, crashed into, stunned to silence at the heartless way he met his end. I can’t process it. But at the same time I have compassion for Donna Adelson; and the people who laughed at her and made fun of how she looked, have fallen off of their self appointed pedestals. Yes, they are content creators, but they are also mean kids; they are spoiled brats on the school ground. They are a mob, lost in the current of riotous judgement where compassion does not exist, where the very possibility of reasonable doubt has been quashed. They allowed themselves to be swept along in mob mentality and it was ugly. It was off balance. It was far away from the scales of justice. It demonstrated callousness in living color. I tried to find one commenter who had anything balanced to say. I found none. Not one.

I can now clearly see how an innocent person can be riotously convicted, too.

I watch True Crime YouTube every day. I follow some of the most heinous crime stories as they play out in the justice system. I don’t always agree with the way these things are handled and I have learned that judges are not ethereal creatures with wings and perfect judgement. Some are just plain corrupt. Not sure I like knowing that, but it feels better knowing the truth, rather than grasping at a dream. Still, some are as close to perfect as it gets, and I’m glad to have seen them in their element.

This judge, presiding over Adelson’s trial, was one of the good ones. But he insisted that Donna, a 75 year old woman, sit in court all day, day after day, not expressing emotion in any way. It had to be excruciating for her. I think the judge overstepped his bounds. If a defendant is stoic, everyone, and I mean everyone, says they have ‘no remorse’. And thus the jury is influenced. And this judge gave the jury little credit to be able to make up their own minds about how a defendant acted or didn’t act. I can understand banning outbursts, but this judge would not allow anyone, not anyone, to express any emotion or reaction of any kind. That’s a clinical level of need to control in my opinion. And in spite of his overbearing control, the jury was influenced. Schrodinger’s cat.

Donna shouted, “OH MY GOD!” when she heard the word ‘guilty’. As I would have done; as you would have; it was clearly involuntary. And the judge jumped on her in the worst moment of her life, ‘admonished her’ as they like to say. Heartless. Heartless and cruel. My heart broke for this woman. This will surely kill her. This was ugly business, and no, not as bad as the gunshots that killed her son-in-law, but is any death better than any other? Aren’t they all heartbreaking? Shouldn’t they all give us pause? Surely I am not the only one who feels this way.

Her defense attorney did a great job in her closing argument. I heard some things I hadn’t heard in court, and I also started thinking she had some very good points. I started to doubt some of the things I had believed in court, prior. I now have reasonable doubt. I now recognize the effort to make a gripping wish without evidence become fact. They were there. They just were. And once you have a train load of mobsters, well all reason is gone.

I think Donna was an overbearing, cocky, horrible mother-in-law, one of those grandmothers who insist on reliving their parenting years through their grandchildren. I do not understand that mentality. The children are the parents’ children. The grandmother doesn’t get to raise them. And Donna had a strange relationship with her son. You know, one where there’s a hint of the son being leaned into as a husband in a way? Mothers and sons, the same old story.

I wouldn’t have liked Donna on the streets, as they say. She was wealthy and thought she had more power than she did, clearly. I can imagine her looking down on other people who were not rich, thinking she was above everyone else around her. I could see that, but that was not the woman at the defendant’s table throughout the trial. She was a broken old woman with gray hair whose loved ones all turned against her, who was globally hated, and who MAY be guilty, but also may not. Still, she deserved a fair trial. And she deserved some semblance of dignity in the process of justice playing out.

Now when I look at trials where there is a wide, gray streak, I’m careful about how I judge. Donna was targeted by law enforcement, the victim of a ‘bump’. A nudge to get the criminals talking to on another for the sake of solving the crime. But Donna was bullied. The LE officer used the F-word over and over as he raised his voice and verbally abused her, and I was pissed. You don’t bully ANY woman, but in particular, an elderly woman. That’s called elder abuse, and that behavior undermined the whole effort to find her armor chink in my opinion. I became furious with this guy and whoever put him up to it. It was just wrong. And it colored my opinion of the case against her. It seemed like they pushed too hard, almost desperately so.

I think Donna was a tug boat. Small but powerful, able to steer the ship. I think she enjoyed being a bully, a quasi thug, until it got real. That’s the thing. People jump on the bullet train and love having the power of the wind blowing back their hair, never bothering to look ahead on the tracks at what will surely derail the train. It feels good to think you’re strong, until the cuffs snap around your wrist. Those chats, those calls, those emails, each one could be a hesitating point, a place to think about what is being done and more importantly, the consequences. But this, what happened here, is herd mentality. And once you encounter it in handcuffs, you are pretty much finished. And if you encounter an angry mob out for revenge, well, ruined lives are always the result.

And this is why I weep. I weep for loss of humanity, desperate for just a tiny bit of compassion, feeling for fairness and balance in the dark, yes, even for a criminal. Watching someone’s life end is terrible, and should never, ever be entertainment.

I believe Donna will find her new center and she will be okay. She will learn that she has no power and she will learn that if you raise your head above the herd, you become a target. She will learn to live among the little people. I hope one day we will learn the whole story of this crime, though the likelihood is small. But if we do get the rest of the story, I think we’ll find out that Donna is less culpable than the mob thinks. Still culpable, just less so.

Hope springs eternal.

Why Do I Need Title Insurance?

Ok, it’s not usually a BURGER trying to gain unlawful entry into your home. It’s usually a burglar. But you looked, didn’t you? When you think about someone breaking in to your property, the property you own, you don’t usually think of title insurance, do you? Well…two things: 1) do you really own the property?; and 2) are you sure?

Did you know that there are two kinds of title insurance you can get when you buy a property? One type, the mandatory one, is to protect the LENDER. Not you. Interesting that you pay for it, but it’s FOR the lender. To protect their investment. the OTHER kind is not mandatory, but if you don’t have it, you may be at risk. How, you ask? Well let’s look at why title insurance is needed. It is needed to protect you from

  • Errors in public records
  • Unknown liens (e.g., unpaid taxes or contractor bills)
  • Fraud or forgery
  • Undisclosed heirs or ownership claims
  • Boundary or survey disputes

See, we often relax into thinking that title insurance is just to find out where the property lines are. But noooooo. I could add to that list ‘easements’. Your property might have a section which allows someone else free access to drive over it to access ANOTHER property. Or there could be a sewer easement under ‘your land’ that might need to be accessed one day and if you have built a structure there, guess what’s going to happen to that structure? Note that the entity having to access the sewer is entitled to take down that structure and they do not have to replace or pay for it.

Imagine sitting in the recliner in your pajamas, watching TV before you saunter off to bed in your beautiful home, and there’s a Ring doorbell chime. You go to the door and the guy says, I’m the legal heir to this property and I want you out. Oh yeah, it does happen. Why? Because there might be ‘undisclosed heirs’. It usually takes time for them to be told their great, great grandpa’s house was sold, but if they are out there, they could show up and ring that doorbell. OR, the sheriff shows up with an eviction notice, originated by, you guessed it, that undisclosed heir.

So while you are adding up your ‘up front costs’, please include TWO title insurance policies: One for the lender and one for you. If a dispute arises, title insurance pays for legal defense and covers any financial loss — potentially saving you thousands.

Once you buy a home, you want to live in it worry-free. Owner’s title insurance gives you confidence that your investment is protected. So if the BURGER shows up, you can just eat it and go to bed.

Give me a call. I’m a real estate agent and Realtor at Premier Advantage Realty. Find me at brendasellsnchomes@godaddysites.com, or email me, text me, send a carrier pigeon. I’m here!

First Time Buyer and Other Fantasies

Have you thought about what a tough time first time buyers are having these days? Buyers often have to come up with down payment dollars, closing costs, attorney fees and inspection costs, earnest money and sometimes even due diligence fees. As well, buyers often are responsible for hefty real estate agency fees as well. I don’t know about you, but I couldn’t have come anywhere near being able to do that for MY first home. Yes, times have changed, but a dollar is still a dollar.

There are efforts to help first time buyers. There are 100% financing options through USDA, but there are income limits. And there are loan packages with incentive dollars attached, often to be used for closing costs, but those often tie you in to the property for a period of time. I’m NOT a lender, but hopefully this will give you some ideas about what to ask a lender about. Don’t ever be afraid to ask a lender to help you figure out how to use the least money out of your limited funds (if they are limited), because this is what they do every day. And their advice is free.

And guys, make an appointment and go LOOK THEM IN THE EYE while you explore options to get you into your first home and out of the rental gerbil wheel. Remember your RENT can suddenly increase every year, but your mortgage payment will remain stable unless you opt for a balloon loan or an adjustable rate loan product. Balloon loans usually come with a low entry interest rate, as do adjustable rates, but it’s what happens AFTER that you must be aware of and prepare for.

Sellers, if your house isn’t moving and you’re considering a price drop, consider offering a rate buy-down instead. That can make a huge difference for buyers who are shopping payment, which many are.

I’ve said many times, my heart is always with first time buyers. I am always honored to help them with their very first home. If I can help you, I’m at thepremieradvantage.com, and search agents. I’m Brenda and I’d love to meet you.

Everywhere I Look: Condos!

No need to post a picture of condo developments; you know what they look like, right? They. Are. Everywhere. Throw a rock and you’ll hit one (well, don’t throw a rock). Well, so what?

“What” is that the number of resale detached homes is lower than it used to be, as builders swerve into the multiple housing structure lane. Look around you; these structures are going up all over the place, as the push to get people to walk everywhere plays out. Personally, I’m not seeing it for me; I have to have my AC in the summer heat and well, heat in winter. These grand, sweeping ideas work well for builders, who rake in the money; but in the real world, it’s not ever the best idea. My opinion, of course. And who’s gonna carry the GROCERIES? To be somewhat fair, more people can be squeezed into a square mile this way, which is usually the goal. And let’s put a pin in inadequate infrastructure to accommodate all the new cars, water usage, sewer usage…you get the idea.

Believe it or not, there’s still a housing shortage, particularly in detached, single family resale homes. Therefore, prices of those homes are not going down. Not going up like rockets either. What IS happening is that because condos and townhomes are ‘more affordable’, resale detached homes sit on the market a bit longer, up maybe 20 days more than a year ago. And, almost half of homes sold have sold below list price, which is unusual in our brains. In OUR brains, no buyer can ever offer LESS than list price, oh no. In OUR brains, our buyers had to offer more than list price. Not now, though. Not necessarily. Now, buyers are able to offer less…that is until we listing agents realize that the price structure has changed. I will say that I have encountered two multiple offer situations already, though. Both in detached, resale homes, by the way. I predict that will become more and more common. Some people don’t want to live in a stack, and they WILL pay above list price to make it so.

Now, buyers are STILL not really getting closing costs automatically paid all or in part by sellers. But it FEELS like there’s a bit more balance in real estate transactions, notwithstanding the new compensation law. In my business, I find things to be pretty much the same. I’m happy to say that NC has always done right by clients with respect to compensation. No hidden gotchas, no sleight of hand. Not in MY world and not in my companies.

Back to condos (and townhomes). They SEEM to be less expensive, until you factor in the high HOA dues these developments carry. It might seem like a way to get first time buyers into their own home, but often, that is not reality. The payment APPEARS to work, until you add in hundreds of dollars a month for HOA dues. This market is still a very tough challenge for first time buyers who are often trying to set up the rest of their lives at the same time. The home is just one piece of the picture. Now, I find many, many more disappointed first time buyer clients who just cannot make it work. And these are smart, hard working people. Look, if you are a first time buyer, just call me and let’s talk about it. The more you know up front, the better off you will be, and the less disappointed if you don’t know the whole story by the time you start looking.

Lenders try to keep a tool chest of ‘first time buyer’ products, but even with that, those HOA dues keep buyers renting. I don’t like that at all, and I wonder where this will all end up. I envision many empty buildings at some point in the future. Or buildings that were once condos becoming apartments… rentals, in other words.

Word on the street is that some of the Grand Poobah builders are going to lessen or eliminate incentives for buyers. I am not seeing that yet, but what I am seeing is big realtor bonuses offered by these same builders. What good does it do a buyer if their agent gets a big bonus? None. I think that should be illegal. The whole home buying process is about the BUYER, not their agent.

Some builders were offering low interest rates for a while, as they worked out of a pool of cheap money they borrowed during extremely low rates. But I have a feeling those funds might be running low? Not sure. But I’m not getting the low interest rate emails I got last year; I know that. No, I’m getting ‘realtor bonus’ emails now.

Some news outlets are reporting efforts by builders to change the laws to allow them to put higher density developments in. There’s a bill. With a number. Seriously. In other words, if you think the next door neighbor’s house is too close just wait. It will get worse. Builders are a huge, rich lobby. If you want a detached home with a yard, better not wait. I’m serious about that. If there is a push to get everyone to just rent, well the direction we seem to be heading might be working. Buy your yard now, is what I’m encouraging you to do.

Bottom line is this: Buying and selling homes has not gotten easier. For us agents, it is still critical that we keep our eyes open, particularly when dealing with ‘flip’ products. Just because everything inside is new, doesn’t mean the pipes are in good shape, floor joists and roof rafters are stable, you get the idea. Make sure you have a good real estate agent! We, who are good ones, are worth our weight in gold.

Make sure your agent is on top of the statistics and the news, too. That way your negotiation position is stronger. Knowledge is power. If I can help you, I’m here, not going anywhere. I’m Brenda, with Premier Advantage Realty. I’m online and I’m at 919-210-6113.

For Goodness Sake, Upload Good Pictures!

I feel sorry for today’s hoodwinked seller. Yeah, the one who hired an inept real estate agent to market their home for sale. If I look at your home online and see dark images and a reflection of the photographer taking your photos with a phone, I sigh in frustration. Then I click off of your home advertisement. That’s NOT marketing.

Listen, EVERYBODY uses the internet first. And FIRST, they look at your pictures, the ones of the spaces you want them to imagine living in. When I get the PING! notification that there’s a new listing to view and I see AWFUL dark pictures, my head explodes and then I shut down that file. People do not want to buy a dingy, dirty looking home. They just don’t. And I don’t want to work with an agent who is so slack they can’t even take a decent picture. I know they have to upload these images, and I KNOW they see how AWFUL they look. And they just go right along, doing what I consider scamming the seller who hired them.

I’m a real estate agent. I look at THOUSANDS of homes and pictures of homes every year. When I see postings of dark shadowy pictures, I immediately click away. Why? Because the seller doesn’t bother to hire a good agent to present their home in the best light. A good camera and a light attachment are not like buying a Cybertruck. It’s not expensive to do a good job. It takes a LITTLE more effort than grabbing a phone out of your back pocket, but for goodness sakes, these agents owe their client GOOD SERVICE.

Before you hire an agent, look at the pictures they’ve already posted, PLEASE. If they are not well lit, level, nice pictures, then they are hurting your sale. Hurting.

Want to know how easy it is to post great photos? Call me. I’m Brenda, with Premier Advantage Realty and I can help you.

Before You Buy a Townhouse…

Before you buy a townhouse or condo, make sure you check with the homeowners’ association management to find out what percentage of the development is owner occupied. In other words, what percentage of rentals are here? This matters.

Your lender may not want to grant you a loan if the percentage of renters is high, because your target community might be more like an apartment complex than a group of home owners who live there, take pride in owning the home, and protect the value of the property. Renters are transient. Renters bring in some level of uncertainty because they don’t show up as homeowners on record. Renters don’t have the same incentive to protect the property value as owners who live there, and that adds risk. Lenders don’t like risk.

Neither will you, if the first and last weeks of every month bring a parade of moving trucks to block the parking lot and interrupt the peaceful nature of your community. If you buy a townhome or condo in a high rental community, you will never know whom your neighbors are.

These things may not bother you. But be aware. Investors love townhomes and condos, but they do actual damage to property value by filling up these communities with renters. Talk to your real estate agent about this so you can make an informed choice.

I can help. I’m at Premier Advantage Realty,, NC 919-210-6113.

Understanding Local Real Estate Markets: A Key to Home Buying

Real estate is local. I’ve said that many times here. But what does that mean?

It means that within your state, numbers might show a median home price of $300,000. But that’s statewide. Within your metropolis, the median might be $550,000. And then within your LOCAL market, even within your subdivision, or the one you want to move to, the median might be $355,000. Okay, so what?

Well, if you look at the statewide median price, you might lock that price in your brain and not be able to afford anything at all in the area you want to move to. Why? Because that price is not your LOCAL price. You see $300,000 when YOUR median price is really 50K higher. Get it? Gotta go local.

Now let’s talk about median. Median is not the MEAN, or average. Median means line up every house in a line and put a price above it, then find the middle of that line. There it is. That’s the median. Median is not average.

How do they come up with the numbers? Just like that: make a list, find the middle. No attention to amenities in the community, no attention to the age of the house, what kind of condition is it in, ‘popularity’ of the area…none of that. And I’m just going to say it: Popularity includes low crime rate. There it is. If you buy in a high crime area, you probably got a lower home price, but you’re going to feel it when you try to sell.

Okay, let’s look at the notorious ‘price per square foot’ check box. If a home has a higher one, it might have a TON of upgrades that you will never be able to afford, or won’t be able to wedge in, later. So that PPSF might be worth it! Note that the reasons for this higher factor is not called out for you; it’s just entered in the data. Lock in on the ‘median’ and you’re gonna miss that special three-seasons room you always dreamed of having. Take a few minutes to find out how much that extra 5 bucks per square foot actually effects your payment (or ask AI) and you might get a pleasant surprise. Don’t miss out on that dream home over 5 bucks a month. Remember, you want to be happy with your home. There’s not much better than that.

There’s so much information out there that it’s overwhelming. We feel like we’re in a sea of it. The important thing is to connect these data points in the way that makes your perfect home stand out for you. That’s why it’s important to have a realtor who knows the market, and who knows how to look for hidden issues while you imagine placing your furniture. Real estate agents do that.

We are in the age of information, but you know…you know…that a lot of it is bogus. Check and recheck. And there’s still nothing like driving by the home to get a feel for the community. How much shade is there for summer heat, how is the topography? Are you in the bottom of the bowl where all of the runoff will end up in a storm? Is construction uniform? That matters! It goes straight to your bottom line, and remember when you buy, you will also need to sell one day.

Do you hate being hand-shake distance from your neighbor? Well don’t look in the middle of the metropolis! Gotta go out into the ‘banished from the kingdom’ areas (my favorite). And even those are becoming impossible to find. Do you want an acre of land in the country? Well you’re going to have a septic tank and well, for you guys who hate them.

Food for thought. If you want to chat (chatting is free), contact me. I’m Brenda with Premier Advantage Realty. 919-210-6113. And I actually like talking. I know, who DOES that?

I’d Like to Meet the Easter Bunny

Have you ever wanted to actually meet this bunny, or were you just waiting for that basket of chocolate goodies? Heck, I never gave this guy a second thought. Until now. Oh, you know how I am. I’ve gotten quite contemplative in my recent years, and more than that, I love a tangent. It’s almost Easter!

The Easter Bunny gives gifts anonymously. Come on, you never see him. So I’m gonna call it anonymous. He never asks for anything in return. He gives you the amazing gift (talking chocolate here) even if you don’t need nor deserve it! He never forgets Easter. He’s always right there.

He loves you! If he didn’t, he’d leave rocks, or scare you awake. He gives you the things you like and even some you didn’t expect. And I think it would be very cozy warm and fuzzy to hug the Easter Bunny, don’t you think?

Yeah, I’d like to meet Mr Bunny. Just to say thanks.

When it is Time To Downsize

There are so many seniors in the market now, looking to downsize into a more manageable space. Maybe the need is to live on one level, or maybe it is just to have less real estate to manage. Any way you look at it, it is a specialized place to be in life, and it requires a special real estate agent to help you navigate it. Times have changed, laws have changed, real estate and even how to get through it, have changed. And I find that my clients appreciate that I listen to them, that I have empathy for their fears and the sadness they feel when they have to choose what to take with them and what to leave. And importantly, I find that my clients love that I do not rush them. These kinds of late-in-life decisions are weighty and they deserve thinking through.

One of my specialties is working with seniors. I am one. I know how it feels to enact dramatic changes later in life, and I’m really good at helping my seasoned clients navigate through. The most important thing for them is to focus on the excitement they will encounter in finding that new home, getting to incorporate some of the things maybe they didn’t have in their last, long term home. Eventually, all of my clients settle in, embrace and even love their new life. That’s what you want. And that’s what I want for you.

I work very hard and with love for my seniors on this journey. I hope you will call me so I can be of service. I am Brenda, with Premier Advantage Realty, at 919-210-6113.

Learn to use BRAIN.

You’ll notice in this image that there are no cords, no batteries. This is the instrument that requires some thought to be in place before keys are struck. It is a typewriter. Purely mechanical, purely reliant upon ideas to come from the mind of operator, or someone plagiarized, which has become all too frequent. Once upon a time…relax, it’s not Snow White…people used these to produce written text: Letters, memos, books, reports, even tests for school. Remember tests? You know, before merit was killed off and education became indoctrination, before actual education was eliminated. There was a brief moment when it was ‘dumbed down’; but then it was snuffed out. This is why people at Harvard can’t do math, that statement I’ve been making for a long time now.

Once upon a time, people had to rely upon “The Big Three” (ABC, NBC, CBS) for news. Anchors on these networks were greatly respected, even revered. Why? Well you could never tell what their own opinions were. Why did that matter? Because we didn’t tune in to hear an editorial rant; we tuned in to watch news, not their OPINION of the news, and we got the truth. How we processed that was up to us; we had to think about it.

These days, all we get from Main Stream Media is garbage attempts to disrupt and indoctrinate. Main Stream is a misnomer now anyway. Main Stream is actually YouTube now. Now, there are thousands and thousands of places to get info about any single news story. So for thinking people (aka people with the ability to think), this is paradise. For thinking people, we are in our element.

The world is full of scared, lazy, time-out everybody gets a trophy for showing up generations. How do you like it, lazy parents? It’s a mess! I’ll tell you, I’m so tired of people in media saying julery instead if jewelry, saying ‘real-i-tor’ instead of REALTOR, and they are in the anchor chair!! In my opinion, if you cannot pronounce the name of your career, you should be kicked out of it. In any case, you advertise your lack of education when you cannot pronounce everyday words. You want to say it that way? Okay, just stay off of my radio and TV. Bottom line is that we are seeing the ‘I showed up’ crowd now in charge. No WONDER we have global issues.

On top of rewarding ignorance, we have allowed rampant violent aggression to become the norm. Whatever emotion pops up first is okay to act out, and more and more often, it is hate and anger. What is the solution? Who can say. I do think it would be a good idea for schools to teach logic, beginning right from the start. Teach teamwork, right from the start, and punish hateful aggression. We have to cure the cancer that has infected our world.

Not everything is a crisis.

Speaking of crisis (you know I have to talk about real estate), sometimes people need a realtor BECAUSE of a crisis. Okay I’m talking about divorce. I’m shaking my head. Now, most marriages end that way. Sad. But know, if you are heading that way, there are RULES in real estate. Better get an experienced agent…and one who will understand what you are going through. That’s me.

I’m Brenda, with Premier Advantage Realty. Call me at 919-210-6113